The Rotten Thing my Sadistic HOH Did!

If you read my blog, you already know that Jay is devious and conniving. Let's also add sadistic to that. Yeah, I said it. Sadistic. As in, deriving pleasure from causing me mental anguish. Enjoying it. Laughing at his cleverness. Ummm...yeah. For the record, I don't share his amusement. Like about what he did last night. Last night, he wanted to see me suffer. And suffer I did.

Let me digress for a moment before telling you what happened.

In DD, sometimes we're told to do something we don't like. This is the time, when we remember why we live this lifestyle, how much we love and want to honor our husband, and we make the choice to obey his wishes, right? Of course! So umm...any HOH's reading out there--right now, please kindly skip to the next paragraph. You are not permitted to read the rest of what I have to say in this one. The rest of this paragraph is girl talk. So go ahead, go on, scroll down, we'll wait........................................having our periods...I said scroll down!...........................sappy chick flick movies...................okay, I think that did it, all evil ogres, grumpy bears, and assorted heads of household gone? Good. Now for some girl talk. Obeying's hard sometimes! Especially when it's something we really, really want! And I don't know, sometimes temptation seems just too hard to resist. Sometimes, at least, if you're like me, and occasionally misplace your halo somewhere (I have ADHD, I lose things, what can I say?), you reason that umm...just this once, it's got to be worth it! Maybe this time, you'll be able to hold on to that happy memory, and even smile through your coming punishment! Yeah! Even if not, at least, maybe having this one cool thing will make that steep price later easier to pay! Like, how bad can a punishment really be? And on the other hand, how good would this thing be now? Don't know about you, but I occasionally seem to have a kind of spanking amnesia when faced with something bright and shiny, (or really yummy), and forget how terrible it really feels! Consequences seem so far away during these times! Had those thoughts? Yeah, they're incredibly dangerous! And so anyway, we find ourselves toying with the idea of, gasp, what I know at least in our household as the other DD, the monster of offenses. That would be "Deliberate Disobedience." Eek! I know, I know. But I mean, go big or go home, right? Right? Sometimes a girl's gotta do, what a girl's gotta do...


We had a party to attend. I arrived separately from my Jay, way later, as I had to work. So he was responsible for bringing the gift from us, the wine, and something to share. Now anyone who knows me at all, knows that I love a tiny bit of alcohol, every now and then. Not because of the effect, I don't ever drink enough to get drunk, nor would I ever. I experienced a hangover once, and I didn't like it! I don't even care much about getting tipsy. It can get annoying (even though I've been told I'm entertaining, mostly because people can't believe I'm such a lightweight). But for me, truly, it's all about the taste! I like it sweet. Really sweet. With that barely alcohol taste to it, just peeking through the other flavors. And the thing is, you just don't get that same yummy combination of flavors in any other drink! So when I get to drink, which is not massively often, I really enjoy it! I like having just a little, right? Maybe a glass. And this was wine! Good for the stomach and the heart! I mean, even Jesus enjoyed wine, for crying out loud!

To explain, there's no alcohol in our house. Jay had a difficult childhood because of alcohol, and I'm understanding of that. But out of the house is different. Parties are cool, because it's one of those times I usually get to have a drink. As in one drink, unless it's incredibly diluted. The rule is, though, that, at all times, I must ask first, whether privately or by secret signal. Almost always Jay says yes. He knows it's a special treat for me, and so he almost always allows it. "Almost" being the operative word here. Because this time? Yeah, this time, he didn't. He further said that I was not allowed one drop, as punishment for my horrible behavior lately. I'll plead the Fifth on what "horrible behavior" he might be referring to. It would probably fill a whole other post, but we won't go there. Suffice it to say that we've both been under a lot of stress, and instead of persevering through it, I've been letting it overwhelm me and affect how I've been acting. Something my husband hasn't curbing lately, because he has so much that he's struggling to deal with. What it seemed like he was choosing to let go. Apparently I was wrong about that!

So anyway, on getting to the party, I looked at this one sweet wine, that someone had brought, and that I knew I'd love, and considered my options. I had been late getting there because of work, and as Jay had to get up massively early the next morning, he was just leaving. He would never know if I chose to indulge a little, would he? Of course not! But that wasn't an option for me. I can't sneak around, I just can't. And I can't lie to him. So that wasn't going to work. Other options. Hmmmm. Could my dear husband be made to see reason? Perhaps I could work some of my feminine wiles on him. As he was leaving, I went to him, my big blue eyes pleading. "I'm sorry about yesterday, I really am. And the other days too. I'll do better, I promise! I'll listen more, I'll get my tasks done. But this is my brother's party! And I've been working all day. Can we just forget about it tonight, and can I just have a little bit of wine?" I asked as sweetly as I could.

"Nope! Not a chance!"

"But didn't you bring some from us? Can't I at least have that one?"

"Yes, I did," Jay answered, "and I know you'd really enjoy to have some," with a look in his eyes of conniving amusement that I only caught later, when the puzzle pieces fit together. "But you're still not allowed any, because of what you did."

"But please?" I tried again. "Please will you reconsider? Just one eensy weensy sip? I just want to try it! Because you picked it out!"

"No, Kay! I told you you're not having any, and believe me, you better not!"

"But even though I want to obey, I don't know if I'm strong enough to resist the temptation, Honey! There's this one that looks REALLY good!"

"Let's put it this way," my HOH answered, "you take even a sip, and it better be worth three hard paddlings a day at the new maximum, for three days, because that's what you'll be getting. So go ahead, decide if it's worth it!"

I gulped. The most I've ever had to take is two of those during a day, and I thought I was practically going to die then! Three? Suddenly the temptation didn't seem that overwhelming anymore. I stayed away from the alcohol.

Until a little later. When my host beckoned me to the wine I had been looking at longingly earlier, saying I had to try the wine that Jay brought. Get this: she said he'd told her he'd gotten it, because he knew above all I'd really like it! Several people went on about how it tasted sweet like a wine cooler, and I should try it, since he'd gotten it especially for me. Yeah, sweet guy. Uh huh. I can think of another word for it, not as complimentary...

Anyway, yeah. It was for me all right. He wanted to make sure my punishment was especially exquisitely tortuous. By having something there that he knew would drive me crazy. As I had to force myself to resist the temptation. All. Night. Long. Ugh!

So did I give in? Are you kidding me? Me, deliberately disobey my husband? Of course not! (Okay, I'll admit the idea of being in massive pain and unable to sit down for way longer than the three days I'd be spanked for can really motivate a person). So yeah, I suffered through the night, made a polite excuse as to why I wasn't having any of the alcohol my own husband had brought for me, and went home with an BAC level of 0.0. I lasted through the night, but I have no doubt my sadistic Jay fell asleep with an evil grin on his face, knowing what I must be going through, while effectively ensuring my obedience.


Okay, okay, I'll say it! Geez! My husband is not truly sadistic. He doesn't enjoy making me suffer. He loves me and wants to see me happy. He just chose a different way of getting my attention this time. Partly because spankings for infractions haven't been able to happen as much lately, due to present stresses, and in all honesty, I was kind of taking advantage of that. Did I like his lesson plan that he effectively carried out? Umm...no! But I do know I gotta hand it to him on scoring high points for creativity. In all fairness, I'll give him that.

For the record, though, I still stand by my statement that what he did was still absolutely rotten!