Temptations & Testing, Testing,1,2,3...

This past weekend was very difficult. Jay left for almost the whole weekend. Stupid fishing! Stupid sockeye salmon! Grrrr! I HATE being left alone for the weekend. He knows this. But I had to work, and I couldn't get out of it. And he needed this. It was my gift to him, my sacrifice. So I'm thinking I'm a pretty good wife, huh? Well, after all that, I'm told the 9:30pm internet/phone rule (see previous post) stands even when he's gone?!! Not cool! C'mon, already sacrificing here, you ungrateful...ugh! Yeah, let's just say I didn't think it was fair, and I honestly had little intention of obeying him, because what's he gonna do? (I know, I know, deliberate disobedience, gasp! And yes, I know that's not a wise question to ask).

Well, I was venting in a chat on the Learning Domestic Discipline Social Network, and I was reminded of why it might be good for me to still honor him in this, in spite of how I felt. So a special thank you to you, Christina, for helping me see that. Because I got through the night without disobeying! Yay for me!

The next night, though, I confess was a little more difficult. It started out all right. But then my brother called, knowing I'm a night owl, and I answered the phone, completely forgetting the rule. Remember Jay's explanation of why I get in so much trouble after I mess up once? If you haven't read it, you can read it here. So...um, yeah, still not doing great at that whole thing. I realized I had broken the rule within the first minute. Well, should I really be expected to get off the phone when I'm already in trouble? (Be quiet, people, I get to answer!) No way! If I'm going to get punished, why not make it count for something? Teehee! Rebel girl out to play! I even then briefly got on the internet! Nothing matters anymore! Yeah, not a good attitude to have. Way to think beyond the present, Kay!

So the next day I was working and didn't see Jay until later. When we did talk, he told me what I would soon be getting, a major punishment. Eek! BUT he also told me I could get out of it if I didn't do anything wrong for the rest of the night. Well, you don't have to tell me twice! (I think...well, mostly...okay, just shut up!). So anyway, right away I put my rebel girl under padlock and key, I afixed my halo firmly over my head, and although I had one slip-up that he could have counted, I was pretty good. And at night I found out why he had been so lenient, as we engaged in definitely more pleasant activities with positions I way preferred. :)

So that brought us to yesterday. My husband had given me a free pass. And I was so aching to please him in gratefulness, that I had a perfect day. Yeah. That's what I'd like to say happened. That's what I admit should have happened. But as far as what did? Well, let's just say I decided to test the waters. Just a little.

I'd been dealing with the baby all day. as well as paperwork, and there wasn't a lot of time to do much else. So when 9:30 rolled around, and I was busy reading blogs from the weekend, I stole a glance over at my dear Jay. He was engrossed in a movie. Hmmmm....I wonder if he'll notice. So I stayed on. I know, I know, deep in blogs on submission, while decidedly not submitting. The irony is not lost on me.

Jay said nothing, didn't even seem to care. Cool. Well, I wasn't going to test my luck too far, just maybe...five minutes?  Well, that turned into ten. There were some really good posts, what can I say? Fifteen. Fifteen should be good. Then I'll get off the computer, get ready for bed in fifteen minutes, and all will be well. Ha! I knew I could get bend the rules a little, and still get away with it!

Suddenly my husband's rather nonchalant voice pulled me out of my thoughts. He spoke without even looking at me."You do know the time, right? That's a whoopin'." Now he turned to me, his expression clearly HOH. "I suggest, for your own sake that you get off that computer immediately, or it's about to get a lot worse for you."

I gulped at his tone. Yep, okay, no problem, right away, oops...and what was I thinking? I obeyed in a hurry, having no doubt where he stood now.

Once in bed, Jay made completely good on his word. The spanking was hard to take. It was exactly what he'd said I'd get. And I don't think I'm going to test him on this issue again anytime soon.

In fact, I'm thinking about giving up testing altogether. I admit, I've tested my husband a lot over the months we've done Dd. Trying to find out the line, seeing what he'll truly notice and what he won't...but I think those days are done. Jay has convinced me he's more than ready to answer a challenge. Dang it! So I'm getting that overall feeling...it may not be worth it! Then there's feeling what a certain still sore posterior has to say on the subject!

Yup, I'm pretty sure my bottom is against all future testing. And...I'm inclined to agree.